Funny Scottish Beanies 🧢

Keep Yer Heid 🧢

From Baw Heid to Rocket Heid, I’ve stitched up the perfect insults to keep yer lugs cosy. Choose from the classic acrylic cuffed beanies or the new organic cotton ribbed ones (£2 more, but softer and snugger). These embroidered hats are bold, sarcastic, and pure dead brilliant for the Baltic months. Whether your pals call ye a Massive Heid or you just want folk to Gie’s Peace, there’s a beanie here with your name on it (sort of).

Free shipping, always.

5% Off 2+ Items!

Hiya, I’m Sharon 👋

I run Sarcastic Scots — a one-woman brand (with a wee supervisor 🐾) turning Scottish humour, sarcasm and a healthy dose of crabbitness into things folk actually want to wear.

I release new designs regularly, so keep an eye out — or sign up to my newsletter to be the first to see all the good stuff. 💙

Everything here is made to order just for you, which means printing and delivery can take a wee bit longer — but it also means less waste and better quality.

If you’re not sure where to start, these Best Sellers below are loved by Scots everywhere. 👇🏻

Shop Best Sellers 🌟